Category Archives: humour

More ridiculous doggerel

1. When your biscuit isn’t Nice Or your bourbon is disturbin’ Or your custard “cream” is more a custard “paste”; If your fig roll isn’t rollin’ Or your hobnob’s not hobnobbin’: Please don’t let your broken biscuits go to waste. … Continue reading

Posted in art, humour, occupation, poetry, writing | 2 Comments

Tonight, Matthew, I’m going to be… John Cooper Clarke

I went to a fancy-dress do for new year’s eve. The theme was “80s rock”, which made me wonder if I could get away with punk rock. In fact, I wondered if I could get away with being punk rock … Continue reading

Posted in art, christmas_2013, cotswolds, diary, entertainment, environment, experience, geography, humour, lancs, location, made_our_own_fun, parties, poetry, seasons, time | 2 Comments

Christmas made-up jokes, from 2011

We have a reusable advent calendar made of fabric, because we’re middle-class. Last year we filled it with jokes that K. and I wrote ourselves. They’re mostly of a standard you might find in a Christmas cracker, if the Christmas … Continue reading

Posted in art, christmas_2011, christmas_2012, diary, entertainment, experience, humour, made_our_own_fun, seasons, time | 1 Comment

From the local gossip column, 29 April 2012

Our regular west Oxfordshire correspondent, the esteemed Dr Small Beds, celebrated his thirty-fifth birthday yesterday. This grand old man of letters spent the day with friends at several locations in the city of Oxford, concluding with drinks at the residence … Continue reading

Posted in age, art, cliques, diary, drawing, drink, entertainment, experience, fatigue, friends, gossip, hilarious_jokes, humour, made_our_own_fun, opinion, person, society | 2 Comments

This wasn’t the song about an easy lover that I thought it was going to be either

Easy lover! She’ll get a hold on you: believe it. She’s like no other; Perhaps she’ll die.

Posted in art, entertainment, humour, language, made_our_own_fun, music, songs, word_games | Leave a comment

To the tune of Boogie Nights

Coeliac! Ain’t so bad, long as you don’t eat bread Coeliac! Don’t use wheat; try some buckwheat instead Eat what a coeliac eats (eat what a coeliac eats) ‘Cause coeliacs have always the nicest treats! Got to keep on oatcakes; … Continue reading

Posted in art, entertainment, humour, made_our_own_fun, music | 1 Comment

This wasn’t the song about old people I thought it was going to be

There was an old woman who lived in a shoe; She had so many children she didn’t know what to do. Perhaps she’ll die.

Posted in art, entertainment, humour, language, made_our_own_fun, music, songs, word_games | Leave a comment

The surest way to make a monkey of a man

I just finished Musings of a Monkey, by Steven Baxter. It’s partly a compilation of his blogposts (from Enemies of Reason and other sources), partly a handful of extended essays on the state of journalism and the ramifications of the … Continue reading

Posted in advertising, art, articles, authors, commerce, editing, humour, journalism, media, nu-media, proofing, truth, understanding | Leave a comment

Cotswolds bad driver ode #3

Ken White Overtakes like shite: Less of a driver, More of a blight.

Posted in art, cars, humour, poetry, transport | Leave a comment

Authorship, once gazed upon, can never be erased

One of my reasons for moving this blog to wordpress.com was that I wanted to largely dissociate it from myself: that is, my public self, my employer, my real-life friends. This wasn’t just to be able to make sarcastic remarks … Continue reading

Posted in art, development, emotions, employment, entertainment, experience, far_away, fear, gossip, humour, inspiration, jatte_matters, lies, literature, location, made_our_own_fun, meta, occupation, online_applications, opinion, person, technology, understanding, web | 1 Comment